She Made Me Do It

There are often things that crop up on social media that refer to our lack of privacy in the digital age. Big brother is watching you. If you are unaware of the risk of your online publications being collected or used by a third party then you are a fool. If you are worried about this, you shouldn't be online.

I am not by nature a paranoid person, in fact I'm not a very private person at all. I'm aware of the risks of this, but I prefer to live my life fully rather than worry about who is watching me.

Then there are those of you who go to the opposite extreme, you believe that if you don't do anything wrong, you have nothing to hide. You are also a fool. Laws change. What you do openly and happily today could be illegal in the future. So quite frankly we're screwed. Something that seems totally innocent could be dragged up by authorities in a dystopian future and used to incriminate you.

Therefore I just don't care. What you see is what you get. If my behaviour leads to me being tied to a chair and interrogated, so be it.

I shall now make it really easy for those of you making a file on me. Here is a complete list of all of Melanie's secrets.

1. I don't lock my house. Ever. Don't even know where the key is. If you wish to burgle me, have at it, at least you won't break the windows. Good luck with the dogs.

2. Essex Constabulary, regarding that car chase in 1978, here I am, come and get me.

3. I don't have a vote. If I did I'd vote as far left as available. I don't trust any of them but at least I'd vote my conscience.

4. I grow a number of poisonous plants, on purpose. It's a weird hobby. You never know.

5. Sometimes I keep pigs too.

6. I am:

Pro-choice.
An ally to LGBT people.
Anti-war, except for genuine self-defence.
Pro multiculturalism, and not particularly patriotic. I'm actually anti-border, and given the choice would declare my nationality/citizenship as "Earth".
Anti capital punishment.
A feminist.
An anarchist at heart.

7. If you tested my DNA you'd find I'm not wholly European.

8. I am Pagan, of a very eclectic nature, and staunchly agnostic. Yes, I said staunchly.

9. I don't believe we have been visited by intelligent extra-terrestrial species. I'm open to panspermia, but don't find it necessary.

10. My attitude towards sex is that if there is full informed consent by all parties, anything goes.

11. I believe in free speech, but I approve of laws against hate speech. I acknowledge the difficulty there, so it's a topic I'm particularly interested in.

12. My chief topics of interest are any of the above, ethics in general, history, nature/science, music, art, literature, and minerals.

13. I like both cats AND dogs.

14. I make my bed every morning.

15. I eat meat.

16. I meditate.

17. I shave my armpits in summer. I don't judge those who don't.

18. I don't floss.

19. I don't use marijuana, actually, but I support legalization, because duh.

20. I am happy.


I am certain I've forgotten some, so I'll add to this as they crop up. I dare you to write a similar list.