Saturday, 5 April 2014

For Richard

Nothing for the rest of you to see here, move along.

So, it went like this.....totally out of the blue.....

P: So, Melanie, do you think you'd like a mango and cucumber smoothie?

M: No, actually I don't like smoothies,.

P: What do you mean you don't like smoothies? They are delicious!

M: I don't like them.

P: What don't you like about them?

M: I'm not big on fruit juice, and this is thicker.

P: Oh so it's a texture issue? You have texture issues?

M: No, I just prefer to eat food and drink fluids.

P: Texture issues, huh. Oh well you don't know what you're missing! You should try one.

M: No thanks.

P: You really should, they are very healthy, you like healthy food, I know you do.

M: I eat all the same things in my diet. I don't feel the need.

P: It's the perfect way to get nutrition.

M: I just prefer to eat food, not drink it.

P: So you don't even drink juice? What do you drink?

M: Water.

P: What - all day?

M: Yes. Until dinner, then I have a glass of wine.

P: But fruit juice is good for you!

M: I eat fruit.

P: You are just so stubborn.

M: I just like what I like.

P: But you don't have to be so negative about what others eat!

M: I just don't like it, that's all.

P: Well you don't have to be so difficult about it, jeez. Why do you always have to trash other people's health choices?

M: ...........

Can I just add, this is the same person who said "BLEARGH" quite recently when I said I was having liver & onions for dinner.


  1. HI-larious! Love it! They can't connect with the idea that it's the "vehicle" and not the food. And of course, there's your trashing people's choices. Snark.

    1. And this is why we meditate.

      And drink.

  2. Hand me a glass of whatever it is that you are drinking, Melanie...that was painful to read.

    1. I get by on red wine, which I know you don't like, but dammit we all need something to help navigate the stupid.