Wednesday, 30 October 2013

A Matter of Opinion

Everyone is entitled to my opinion.

People who don't blog are puzzled by those of us who do. To them it really is the strangest of strange hobbies. We are writing to the Universe - although I doubt very much they have thought of it quite like that - with no real obvious audience in mind.

Depending on which non-blogger you ask, they may be more baffled by the serious blogging, the pieces that people take great care over, that read like newspaper columns, because it reminds them of dreaded school homework. Or they may find the much lighter stuff more confusing, people just thinking out loud.

I blog for the same reason you tidy a desk. There's only so much room in my brain for work in progress, some of it has to come out. It may not be finished, but it doesn't matter. It's not being submitted anywhere important. I have an extremely active mind, and if I write down what I'm thinking it frees up space.

Quite often, maybe most of the time, what is on my mind has arisen as a result of what somebody else has said (or written) . Despite having an opinion on everything, which I can articulate quickly, I don't always want to comment directly. Because having the ability to do so does not always justify doing so. Sometimes keeping my thoughts to myself is the better option.

It's a choice. Freedom of speech, both in law and in social behaviour is too precious to corrupt with poor decisions. If I were to speak my mind all of the time, I would hurt people. Far too often, the honest truth, the thought that comes to mind, would be too harsh. It would contradict too many views, criticize too many deeply felt attitudes, and do unnecessary harm.

Tact is a beautiful thing. It is where kindness rules over honesty, and it is always available. It costs nothing, takes very little time, if any, and does no harm to the person choosing not to think out loud.

I find humour in the strangest things, and one of them is a very private humour. I can be seen to smile sometimes when others make me privy to their thoughts. It's not a smile of happiness per se, but something close to the smile associated with discovery. A people watching moment. Easily found on Facebook. I love Facebook.

In this way, I smiled several times in the last 24 hours, privately, over statuses, with only cats watching, over choices made by others to say exactly was on their mind, at times I would have chosen to say nothing, and two of them have stuck in mind, resulting in these words here.

The first was a statement. It was a strong statement, which is exactly what Facebook statuses are for, and I applaud statuses that actually make sense. It was however a total contradiction of the poster's objection to a status of mine not so long ago. That in itself caused me a discovery smile. Of course my mind flashed "hypocrite" but I chose not to say so. To say so would cause unnecessary argument. Hypocrisy is a human right. But there was a second level of smile when I remembered that the person who wrote this statement is very keen on minds being freely spoken , and would quickly lambast me for excessive tact, yet would absolutely object to being called a hypocrite. I enjoyed these thoughts very much, and kept them to myself. Discovery. Fascination. Fodder for character writers. Remember it, it's useful, but no harm done, move on.

The second was a comment following a status. It was exactly the sort of thing I avoid doing wherever possible, which is making a remark that, while it begins "What I do is.....", actually screams "What you should do...........". It would be unfair to suggest that all comments beginning with "What I do is...." read this way, because they don't, and in fact saying "What I do is...." is usually the gentlest, and least pushy way to suggest an avenue of possibility. But every so often, due to the level of difficulty of following the advice, for example, it sounds as if "...ner, ner, ner, ner ner!" is added at the end.

For example, if your statement was "I'm so cold", and you got a comment of "When the weather is like this, what I do is go on holiday to the tropics" your reaction might just be a tad negative. Oddly enough, most of us don't have that option.

So it isn't actually helpful. Advice is supposed to be helpful.

And I find this just so amusing. That people come right out and say these things. That's probably very, very wrong of me.

But the best part, the very best part, is that often, when these things are said, and commented on, and then the comments are commented on, a real argument develops. I watch in awe.

This morning I found this on a page I follow:

There is no fight left in her. And that's the best thing that ever happened for her. For far too long the futile battle of light & dark has left her exhausted. She's accepting both light & dark as the inherent gifts of the universe. She's not in a duelling match with them. The light no longer wishes to 'reform' her dark, and her dark no longer wants to 'control' the light. Suddenly, she's not playing the polarity game. She's not fooled into buying the teaching that there's something wrong with her that needs fixing, and she's got work to do before she's finally 'good'. Her divinity is in fully embracing her humanity. All of it. So where's the imperfection? The myth that one day light will vanquish the dark and there will be peace would have kept her exhausted & imprisoned. She's already at peace right now! Even the light and dark within her are sitting at peace with each other. Game over. What she's experiencing in the ceasing of war is an unbelievable tranquillity & peace. Thank goddess she believed in her own wisdom. ~Sukhvinder Sircar 

Presumably this is seen as empowering. So, it was with careful consideration that I chose to object to it. I don't want to rain on anyone's parade. My opinion, while I think valid (or I wouldn't hold it) is often best saved for myself. When I decide to share it, I have to justify that decision. I won't do it on a whim. But this time I decided I would say, simply:

Define dark? Matter of opinion.

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